Publishing Your First Book Means Everything And Nothing.

Becoming A Writer

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Publishing Your First Book Means Everything And Nothing.

Episode 30 of Becoming A Writer podcast.

Rubina G Gomes

Oct 25, 2024

Transcript

Show Notes -

Episode Summary: In this episode, I reflect on the first anniversary of my non-fiction book, Soul Writer vs. Social Writer. After nearly a decade of hard work and dedication, the journey to becoming a published author has been both eye-opening and humbling. I share six valuable lessons learned from this experience that have shaped my perspective on writing and publishing.

Key Takeaways:

Don't Wait for External Validation
- Embrace your identity as a writer without relying on external approval.
- Recognize that validation from others is a bonus, not a requirement for self-acceptance.
Strengthen Your Internal Validation
- Be your own biggest supporter and coach.
- Build your confidence and self-worth from within, viewing the solitary aspects of the journey as opportunities for personal growth.
One Book Doesn’t Make or Break Your Career
- Understand that the publication of your first book is just the beginning of a larger journey.
- Use the experience to learn and prepare for future projects.
Feeling Neutral is Okay
- It's normal to feel neutral about your book’s release if you’ve invested deeply in the process.
- Neutrality often reflects gratitude and acceptance of your work as part of a continuous journey.
The Fun is in the Process and Journey
- Enjoy the creative process of writing rather than focusing solely on the end result.
- Transition from one project to the next to maintain excitement and engagement with your work.
Write Your Next Book
- Don’t rest on your laurels; start working on your next writing project.
- Continually create to keep your audience engaged and to grow as a writer.

Resources Mentioned:

Soul Writer vs. Social Writer (my non-fiction book for writers)

Transcript -

Hello, my writer friends! Rubina here. For our thirtieth conversation, we are going to talk about how publishing your first book means everything and nothing.

Almost all writers dream of publishing their books.

To see it on the bookshelves. To get tagged in posts showing readers reading and enjoying our books. To being at book-signing events and seeing how so many readers are loving our books.

We have this imagination for our books that feels so wonderful.

I thought I would feel the same way when I published my book. Well, I wasn't entirely correct.

The coming week marks the first anniversary of my non-fiction book for writers, Soul Writer vs. Social Writer.

After nine years of being a writer apprentice, the last 2-3 of which were spent working on this book, I was finally able to hit publish and call myself a published author.

As I was inching closer to the publish date, I was hoping to be excited, but I wasn't. I was proud of my hard work and of finally achieving my almost decade-long goal, but I wasn't excited. The day of publishing felt like any other day. I had to force myself to go out and celebrate the day, and to do that, of course I visited the bookstore and the cafe. I also didn't have any loved ones celebrating with me. Not that they didn't love me or care about my work; they were too busy with their obligations. (I know I am giving excuses for them; that's how I am keeping my peace.) And the next day, I was back at my desk, working on my next project.

This experience taught me six lessons:

Don't wait for external validation.
- Don't wait for a published book to accept yourself as a writer. Don't wait for others to tell you that you are a writer. Don't expect others to be there celebrating with you. I know this sounds very depressing, but that's how life is. Others only notice you when you are winning, not when you are alone, struggling, and practising your craft.
- Any external validation you get is, therefore, a bonus, not a requirement.
Strengthen your internal validation.
- As Alex Hormozi says, "You always have to be the person who roots for you before everyone else does."
- You have to be your own best friend, be the shoulder you cry on, be the coach who helps you find a way out. And you are not doing this out of the loneliness you feel. Don't see it that way. Switch the narrative. See it as your character building phase.
- Know that you already are the writer you desire to be. And work on being that version of yourself every day. That's the only proof and validation you need.
One book doesn't make or break your career.
- Unless, of course, you do something that tarnishes your reputation, writing and publishing your first book will not be the biggest deal of your life.
- What it will do instead is give you lessons and open doors for you that you need in the next phase of your writing journey.
- Publishing my Soul Writer vs. Social Writer taught me that self-publishing is not as intimidating as I thought. Now, I know the what, the how, and the timeline I'll need for my next book.
Feeling neutral is ok.
- Initially I felt weird that I wasn't excited enough about publishing my first book. But then I also realised that neither was I nervous, and that's even stranger.
- You see when you have given your all to all the steps of producing your book while also staying at peace with your writer self, publishing the book and sending it out into the world becomes an obvious next step. It genuinely doesn't feel like a big deal.
- It becomes as obvious as brushing your teeth after dinner.
- Feeling neutral doesn't mean you don't care about your work. It means you have just exchanged excitement for gratitude. You feel honoured to be able to write and publish your book, and then move on to the next one.
The fun is definitely in the process and journey.
- This realisation hit me like the frying pan hitting Tom the cat.
- I was excited and having the time of my life while I was working on the book. Once I was done with it and published it, I missed not writing it.
- This feeling is similar to reading a book - you are having a blast when you are reading the book and you get irritated if someone or something disturbs you. But once you are done reading, you miss the world you were in for quite some hours of your life, and you don't know what to do with yourself now. You then take the next obvious step - pick another book to read. And you should do the same with your writing.
Write your next book.
- One of the first suggestions a friend of mine gave me when I sent him my ebook was to start working on my next book.
- That is the most accurate and only advice a writer needs. Your next book, novel, short story, essay, poem - whatever it is, get writing.
- If you are one of those writers who had a thought, idea, experience or story that you want to share and be done with just publishing that one book - that's totally fine. But if, like me, you want to be an author lifelong, then you have to move on to your next work.
- You don't want to be a one-hit-wonder. Instead, you want to keep your readers wondering how on earth you are writing such incredible books, one after another.

I am glad I shared these lessons with you. They are also a reminder to me as I am about to start working on my next book. I hope to publish it in the coming year, and you will be the first to know about it.

What are your thoughts on this? How did you feel when you shared your first work of writing with the public? Did your expectations and your reality match? Feel free to share your experiences in the comment section on Substack and YouTube.

Also, to celebrate the first anniversary of Soul Writer vs Social Writer, I have just released the audiobook format. Do give it a listen and let me know your thoughts.