Feeling Overwhelmed With Your Writing Life? - Simplify it.
The ability to simplify means to eliminate the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak.
Upcoming episode on Becoming A Writer podcast this Saturday — we are going to talk about trusting our writing process.
The ability to simplify means to eliminate the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak.
- Hans Hofmann
I am a Capricorn, so overworking is in my DNA. I am also an INFJ, so people-pleasing in the hopes of validating my existence is also in my DNA. Mix the two, and I get a deadly dose of overwhelm.
For a long time, I believed I had to work my ass off 24x7 to prove that my words were worth reading, that I was worth loving. This very quickly resulted in burnout and anxiety attacks. Thankfully, I let myself take some time off, and as I recovered, I knew I couldn't go back to how I was living, especially my writing life. I had to ensure I was working on my writing dreams at a healthy pace to keep my health and sanity intact. The whole of 2023 was about learning this lesson.
I realised that I had too much on my plate. But why was this the case? I asked myself. Because I was rushing. Why was I rushing? Because I want to achieve my dreams before I die. Where did this thought come from? The sudden death of my 25-year-old cousin's brother made me realise that life is short. But was the rushing helping me? No. Instead of letting me achieve my goals faster, it was making my life short. So what's the solution? Slow down. How do I slow down? By having less on my plate and in my day. Having less of what? Tasks, expectations, projects, stimulations - whatever hinders me from enjoying my writing life. And how do I remove these hindrances? By simplifying my writing life.
That's my aim for 2024 - deeply, satisfactorily enjoying my writing life by simplifying it.
Why Simplifying Our Writing Life Is Good For Us?
Because writing is a complex job. One of the first things I got aware of when I started writing consistently is how energy-draining the task of writing can be. On the outside, it looks as if we are sitting at our desk, drumming our fingertips on the keyboard or scratching away at our paper, but only a writer knows the gruelling storm inside us. Trying to convey our thoughts or ideas in comprehensible words can be emotionally, physically and mentally draining. If we add more complexity to this already complex task, we will make it worse for ourselves.
When we simplify our writing life, we free up space to become productive. By removing the unnecessary, redundant, draining tasks and things from our writing life, we get to focus on the act of writing with more clarity and energy.
And since we now have more clarity and energy, we can become more creative. Previously, we would resort to the quickest and easiest creative options because we were tired - mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually. Now, with renewed clarity, energy and creativity, we can create a safe space for ourselves to experiment and explore new ideas, perspectives and ways of doing things.
This results in less stress, less procrastination and more consistency because now doing the act of writing gives us joy and satisfies us. And the more positive we feel, the more we pour into our writing life.
And the first step to simplifying our writing life? Self-Compassion.
Be Kind To Your Writer Self.
The reason why I was rushing to achieve my goals and was instead getting overwhelmed was because I had this voice inside my head that kept repeating, "We are going to die soon! We need to write and publish our book before that!" Instead of motivating me, this negative self-talk sent me into freeze mode. And in trying to pull myself out of the freeze, I was pushing myself into self-imposed 'have-tos' that were making the situation worse for me.
It took me some time to realise that this self-talk was not helping me, and I had to gently shift my perspective to a more positive one. Instead of chanting, "We are going to die soon!" I changed it to "I can relax and enjoy the task at hand as I have all the time I need." Instead of rushing through my life and writing, I let myself take the time I need to give my best while also enjoying it. It has been a long, healing process of understanding that just because my cousin died early doesn't mean I will, too. That's what was destined to happen. Instead of letting his death scare the life out of me, I should instead make sure I live my life to the fullest and deepest. That I make sure I live my writing dreams to the fullest and deepest. And one can't live fully and deeply if one is constantly overwhelmed and has negative self-talk.
It all starts with a hopeful mindset. A regret I currently have in my writing life is that I cannot work on my novel as much as I would like to. Trying to set the foundation of my writing business takes up all my time and energy, with nothing left for my novel. I cannot even give it time at least once a week, and it frustrates me. Then, a couple of days ago, I heard my inner voice say, "Give the novel a break." Now, I have heard this sentence many times, and my reply every time is, "It is on a break. I am not able to work on it." But this time, I listened. I realised my inner voice was saying that I should give it a break from my mind.
My continuous thinking about it and being frustrated about not being able to work on it is actually slowing down the work I am actually doing and making the time harder. Suppose I focus entirely on the work at hand. In that case, I'll make progress soon enough, which will give me the time and resources to work on my novel the way I want and the way it will be beneficial for the novel. Will I forget the novel? No. Never. Will the novel forget me? No. Never. So if we are there for each other no matter what, then why worry about the temporary distance? Just like I am hopeful that one day I'll be able to bring a golden retriever home, I need to stay hopeful that I'll write and publish my novel.
This means I need to tone down my inner critic and tone up my inner mentor. Critics are people who judge your work without having any experience with it. Mentors are people who have done the work and know how much time and effort you have put in yours and, therefore, are able to give you the proper guidance. My inner critic sees nothing else, but what's wrong with my writing, and when I ask it to show me how to do it, its voice will go all quiet. My inner mentor, on the other hand, congratulates me when I write well, lets me know where I fell short, and guides me to resources that can help me out. An inner mentor is what we need.
Accepting that I am human is another key factor of being self-compassionate towards your writer self. When it comes to other people, I am willing to give them the benefit of the doubt. I totally get it when life comes to their writing aspirations. But when it comes to me, I don't give myself the benefit of the doubt; I doubt my capability to do anything at all. Everyone can do it. Why can't you? is the typical dialogue of my negative inner voice. Over time, I have come to understand two things. One – everyone is winging it. They are doing their best, given the circumstances. Is this the ideal way they want to be doing things? No. But they are doing it to their best capability. Two – I need to treat myself with the same love and care I would my best friend. This means I understand and accept my imperfections and limitations and encourage myself to keep trying my best. It also means celebrating every small win and giving myself a safe space to relax and recharge my creative batteries.
When we become kind to ourselves, we realise that we don't need to be hustling 24x7 to the edge of burnout, depression and anxiety. We can simplify our writing life and allow ourselves to enjoy the ride. That's the point of it all.
How To Simplify Our Writing Life?
Set realistic goals. Don't overload yourself with unrealistic expectations. Set achievable writing goals that align with your schedule and capabilities at the current moment. Break down your writing goals into achievable tasks. Instead of aiming to complete an entire novel in one sitting, set smaller, daily goals that contribute to the larger project.
Create a flexible writing routine. Having a routine is my most challenging task as I work from home and am continuously surrounded by distractions, disturbances and errands. My day is in the hand of the day. So, instead of having a rigid writing routine (and failing to keep it most days), I now have a flexible one. I have a plan for the day ready, but let the day let me know what's in store and shift things around in my to-do list to fit in at least one 2-hour writing session.
Have your workspace organised. Keep everything you need handy and ready. You don't want more than necessary friction between you and your writing time. Once I am done with my writing for the day, I plan out and keep everything ready that I'd need the next day. This way, I can immediately get into writing mode without wasting time looking for things.
Use simple tools. When I started my writing journey, everyone online suggested the writing software Scrivener. According to me, it is the most complicated software a writer could use. During those days, my writing was already overwhelming me; I didn't need writing software to do that as well. Now I use MS Word, Evernote, Notion and Atticus, which make my writing process easy. You don't need complex software to write effectively. Sometimes, a simple word processor or text editor is all you need. Choose tools that enhance your productivity without overwhelming you.
Use tech wisely. As I was writing this essay, my internet connection decided to go AWOL on me. Now I use Evernote, but it does need the internet to save my work. Instead of stressing about it, I switched to trusty Microsoft Word and continued writing from where I left. MS Word is not my favourite for writing (I use it to dump my thoughts), but it works for now. So, make sure whatever tech you use adds value to your writing time. Also, beware of notifications and social media. They immediately suck you out of your writing zone. Turn off notifications, find a quiet space, and block social media during writing sessions.
Pomodoro your way through your writing session. To make sure I don't spend hours staring at my screen and blinding my eyes and mind, I take a break every 25 minutes for 5 minutes. I get up from my chair and walk around. No phone or doing something else or talking to someone. I walk around and think about the next sentence I want to write. This helps me maintain concentration and prevent burnout.
Know when to stop. On a typical day, I can write for about 2 hours. On a good day, it takes about 3 hours, while on a great day, it's 4 hours (this happens when I feel like I am running on spiritual Red Bull). But I never go over 4 hours. That, for me, is a sign that I am working to live, not living to work. I don't need to grind away at the keyboard to prove I am busy working. Being busy doesn't mean I am being productive or successful.
Practice self-care. Again, writing can be emotionally, physically and mentally demanding. We must ensure we care for our physical and mental well-being through adequate sleep, healthy eating, and relaxation. Watching movies, reading books, baking cakes, spending time with friends and family recharges my batteries, replenishes my inner creative well and gets me geared up for my next writing session.
