A Writer's Race Against Time And Technology
Art For Art's Sake: Vol 2 Part 12
I jumped right into my self-employed writing career the day I graduated. And I thought that since I entered this entirely different path from the usual crowd, I escaped the "rat race."
WRONG!
I may not be running the rat race my friends are running, but being in a creative line has its own rat race.
And it's not a race against your fellow humans. As a creative, you race against time and technology.
Race Against Time
As a creative, as a writer, I always feel I don't have enough time.
I have a bazillion ideas (ok, maybe 20, but they feel bazillion to me) that I want to write. I have multiple projects going on simultaneously, each going at a painful snail's speed (because... obviously). And no matter how much I time block, batch, or prioritise, nothing seems to move the needle at the speed I want.
My June's health scare made me realise that the system I have right now may look from the outside is working, but it's falling apart.
The first half of June went into diagnosis, and the second half in recovery. During the recovery phase, I had only two things on my to-do list (instead of the usual 5-10 things - I know, I am dumb-dumb). The two tasks of my day were - physiotherapy in the morning and work in the evening (no more than 2 hours).
Physiotherapy is self-explanatory, while work entailed some days writing, some days journaling, other days running errands, baking cake, some admin stuff.
4 hours of my waking hours went into these two activities. The rest of the waking hours... I did nothing.
Well, I did what I felt like doing. No checkbox to check, no deadline or compulsion. Some days I took a nap; some days, I read; some days, I watched some show, chatting with my mother; I definitely scrolled Instagram.
And then there was this one particular evening when it was pouring rain outside. So I took my sweet time making some delicious coffee, took it to the balcony, and enjoyed it while I watched the rain. Just me, my coffee and the soothing pitter-patter of rain. I couldn't even remember the last time I felt this calm and content.
All this made me realise that I wasn't happy. While I was doing what made me happy, both personally and professionally, I wasn't satisfied because I was taking the time to enjoy them. I would always jump to the next thing on the to-do list before fully embracing what I had done before.
And though I still have a bazillion things to do, I realise that filling up every slot in my day is not the answer.
I shouldn't treat myself like a machine. Well, even machines need regular service and oiling if they are meant to work efficiently and effectively.
Speaking of machines...
Race Against Technology
I believe the reason I felt that I don't have enough time is because of technology, mainly the Internet.
I have realised that the Internet and its algorithms perpetually keeps us in FOMO.
It made me believe that if I don't write my essays and publish them bi-weekly, if I don't keep up with the trends, if I don't upgrade myself and my content with every upgrade they make, I'll be behind. Then the algorithms will put a vain carrot in front of you, and you'll keep running after it hoping to catch it. You will not realise that it's hanging from a stick attached to your back, will always be out of reach and, by the way, you are running on a treadmill, so you're going nowhere.
And don't even start with all the AI stuff happening right now. Heartbreaking!
Again, the forced brake and break I got in June made me wonder where I am going with this online thing of mine. While, technically, I am writing, it's starting to feel bland and lifeless. And I realised that was happening because I was letting the Internet decide my writing career and journey instead of the other way around.
I unconsciously sold my soul to the Internet devil.
And, in turn, I was losing my love of Writing and Reading.
Nah, can't let that happen. Not anymore.
I need time and technology by my side, not standing opposite me.
